"What I learned about Lymphedema"

Tonight was the lymphedema workshop. Brought the whole family so if my radiated brain got clogged up, I had 4 more ears to catch the info.

We actually learned a lot. I learned that the pizza place down the block had "5 star pizza", according to my daughter, who hungrily wolfed down a steamy slice that came fresh from the oven, 10 minutes before our lymph class.

20% of breast cancer patients get lymphedema. I'd like to think I'll be in the 80%, but then again, I don't seem to be that good at beating the odds these days. Still... I'm not obese and don't plan on becoming so. I had only 6 nodes stolen in surgery. I have lived a very active lifestyle. So, that's awesome.

The bad stuff? Well, the breast cancer, the mastectomy, the lymph nodes gone, and the radiation that is currently burning the shit out of my once real breast and my armpit. And, I was informed today that they turned UP the radiation zaps on my pit. That's the spot that has been burning bad. Oh, joy. How 'bout I slam my head with a hammer over and over? That way, when I stop to get on the "Radiation Bed of Death", my head will feel some relief and I won't mind the sizzling skin.

No needles or blood pressure on the left arm. Check.

The good stuff: she is a fan of exercise. She also thinks that bag issues are so 10 years ago. Yeah, I shouldn't lug around 1000 lbs. of whatever in my shoulder bags. But normal carrying? Ok. I'm still nervous, but it made me feel a little better. And my backpack carrying? It's comfortable for me and makes it much lighter. She said, great!

Other things to avoid: too much sodium (oops, last night was basically a dinner salt lick!), jacuzzi's and saunas (um, damn!), sunburns (tell my freaking radiologist!!), insect bites (which I'm highly allergic to!), manicures (I'm glad I am a DIY girl, but boy, I like pampering... sigh...), gardening without gloves (how dorky, but I love my little garden in the summer - might be time to just trash the rosebush?), and a few other goodies that I fogged out on, I'm sure.

Flying. I do it enough to be on the alert! I'll be packing my sleeve/gauntlet in my carry on, and if anything looks suspicious, or if my arm looks like those inflatable things for emergency landings, on it goes. And I can't take it off until touchdown. Otherwise my nodes might go looney tunes and blow up worse. Way too much to think about! I always drink tons of water on planes, but I need to really get water logged now. The good thing is that I'll have to get up to go to the bathroom a lot - another thing suggested (getting up and moving, not necessarily the pee part).

Am I less paranoid? Maybe 30%, which is pretty good.

Hey, is my arm getting puffy? It feels odd.

I've been having that feeling for a few days now. And I know how my mind works. Is it all imagination? It looks cool, like it's my arm. My veins are bugging out of my hands, my tell-tale wrinkles are smiling at me. My rings fit. But still, my mind races. I'm the girl who cried "Lymphedema!"

I need a good night's sleep. But I have work to do. Crap. Need to finally email the draft of an article. Down to the wire for sure, but it was tough to write. ESPECIALLY WITH MY STAY-PUFT ARM. Just kidding. I think.