Tuesday night, the calm after the storm.

Well, we never lost power, despite the rest of the city. Luckily, we have our own powerhouse, independent of Con Ed.

I never thought I'd wear my gorgeous new silk dress for the first time with a surgical bra, but here I am. It's beautiful and I feel silly, but in a way, I'm glad. It's comfortable, it fits everything where it has to be. My cleavage is industrial white cotton with a big old velcro strip, and the halter style dress is offset by the humungous matching white cotton straps, also velcro-laden. So it takes elegance away, but when I walk, it swishes against my legs, it poufs out with every supermodel turn, and no, I'm not actually moving in an elegant fashion. Hard to do when you're saying "owowowowowwww" under your breath with every move. But, let a girl dream...

I haven't had tylenol since early morning. I guess that means I'm getting better. But I'm not without pain or discomfort. I just feel safer knowing my pain than not. I won't move in a way that could compromise healing. And I am willing to take it if it gets to a point that I really need it. I'm stubborn, but not stupid. If I think my pain will impede healing, then of course, I'll be crawling inside the tylenol bottle. Because I want to get better.

I rubbed a bit of arnica on the excessive bruising near my left armpit and it did wonders. I'm going to have hubby do it tonight, he can get in more than I can. It's eerily numb. I hate to think about my nerves being severed, and hope that they can regenerate and reconnect. But I guess a numb arm is better than cancer devouring my soul. Yup.

I did my Halloween nails, even though I'm guessing that Halloween will be cancelled or postponed. I sure hope so, as that would give me a chance to possibly go out.  (Um, likely no...)  I'm really hoping to get to the doc this week, or at least someone who can remove the drainage tube. I know it will be awful if it's in longer than it should be. I'm not in the mood to wear this awful bulb around longer than necessary, but also for the extreme discomfort that goes along with removing a tube from my body that has been there long enough to settle in and call it home. Maybe I can find a video on Youtube to take us through, step by step??  :)

No thanks.

So as I muddle through the discomfort in my gorgeous dress and Halloween nails, I smell the smells of dinner - organic grass fed burgers, spinach salad, sauteed mushrooms, and rumor has it that the husband and child are planning on baking gluten free chocolate chip cookies.  Hmmmm.  Life could be worse. I'm loved. I'm alive. I'm going to feel like me again at some point, right???